Don’t!

 

‘Know-it-alls’ – don’t you just hate them?

We’ve all heard  these words –

  • ‘Don’t do it like that!’
  • Surely everyone knows that!’
  • You’re going to do WHAT?’

It’s not easy travelling your own road.

It’s very easy to get lost.

So many forks along the way.

Which is the ‘right one’?

So many confusing sign posts.

Many lead  to a dead end.

Or a boggy patch.

Or tangling brambles.

Or stinging nettles.

 

I suppose I should ask the way but when I do I get even more confused.

 

These days I try to listen to ‘me’ more than I used to.

It takes confidence to do that.

I ask myself –

Q.   Why is MY opinion worth less than that of others?

A.   It’s not. It has Equal Worth.

If someone asks for my advice/opinion I say this-

  • What does your gut feeling tell you?
  • What do you WANT to do?

Then I might give my advice/opinion but I always add this-

  • It doesn’t matter what I think/would do if I were you. I’m not you. You must choose your own path.
  • What’s the worst that could happen? So you end up in the stinging nettles… That’s fine! You won’t take that path next time!
  • The important thing is that it’s YOUR choice, YOUR risk, YOUR path through the woods.

 

Today, over on Darren Rowse’s Problogger I read this – 

‘The key is to not swallow everything whole but to take what resonates with you and to apply it to your situation and to calmly leave what doesn’t ‘fit’ aside.’

Such a wise man…

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8 Comments

Filed under action, change, Confidence Coaching, expectation, fear, goals, hope, persistence, plans, progress, risk, success

8 responses to “Don’t!

  1. Paul

    Linda, I can really relate to the advice on giving advice. I for one am extremely guilty of giving advice with no caveats…and then not getting quite the kind of response I had expected! I’m going to make that my focus area for the week ahead.

    • Thanks Paul.
      I do hate it when someone tries, and sometimes succeeds, in making me feel my opinion/view is not valid. I try to take my own advice more these days!

  2. Christine

    Wise and sensible words as always, Linda. I am one of those who always asks for opinion and approval from others but I do ask myself why? Your post is a reminder to do so more often…thank you.

  3. I used to get really intimidated when people tried to force their opinions on me, and because I disliked that feeling, I hesitated to give my opinion to others. I’ve gotten a lot more confident and realize opinions are nothing more than a person’s viewpoint based on their experiences. There is rarely just one truth in a situation.

    • Exactly that, Jean. Vey clearly put, thanks!

      Sadly so many people have that tendency to intimidate and it can be hard to stand your corner with them.

      I think I’m getting better…

  4. I have printed out your wise words to remind me not to give advice so easily. In my work (running postnatal courses) I try not to give advice. I really like your questions and caveats and think they would be great for my groups to think about. Your post has made me realise that in other situations, for instance with the children, I am much more likely to give advice. I am going to try and hold back instead of giving advice so freely.
    Thank you.
    Melanie

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