Tag Archives: instinct

4 Secrets My Snowman Showed Me About Having A Positive Spin


He was my first snowman.

My cheeks were red with excitement and the cold.  All he needed was a hat and I ran indoors to ask mum if I could use one  of my knitted ones. With great ceremony I put it on his head and then stood back. He was as tall as me! He was smiling, and I’d made him all by myself.

That night, while I was getting ready for bed I heard an ominous sound. I knew what it was, it was the sound of water dripping. The icicles by the back door were melting and the snow looked different somehow. I stared put between my curtains at my snowman in the middle of the garden and tears crept down my cheeks.

Next morning he was gone. Just his blue knitted hat lay on the emerging grass, with his lumps of  coal eyes.

Last week I thought about that snowman.

I thought about the snow we’d just had and how people reacted to it. I realised that my long-ago snowman had started me on the road to having a Positive Spin.

Here are the 4 Snowman Secrets to having a Positive Spin:

1.   It’s  too easy to say ‘No.’

The day is snowed heavily we could have easily said ‘No’ to going out. After all, the house was very cosy, we had stuff we ‘ought’ to have been getting on with. But out we went. What we would have missed if we’d stayed in!

Exquisite beauty, twigs transformed, a silent world, a traffic free road and childlike fun.

I’m going to try to say ‘Yes’ far more in my life. What about you?

It’s so easy to feel wary, scared, afraid of change. But when we say ‘Yes’, we rarely regret it.

2.  We must appreciate people while they’re with us.

I was so sad when my snowman ‘died’. I’d only just met him and he was gone again.

I don’t want to sound morbid, but it’s often not until people leave us that we realise their importance in our lives.We must tell them how much they mean to us, show them we value them and give them hugs, virtual or real.  It never seems to be the right moment. I’m going to try to tell them more often …

3.   We must be proactive.

If I hadn’t built my snowman that day it would have been too late. It didn’t snow again that winter. I would have missed it.

It’s the same with life’s opportunities. If we don’t ‘seize the day’, the day will be gone. When we have the chance to learn something new, travel to a new place, make a new friend, we must take it. Before the opportunity disappears.

4.   Take that risk!

We went to see the children sledging. It was a delight to see them. And then, as you know from this post, I was offered the chance to join in. It would have been so easy to say ‘No’. But I said ‘Yes’ and took the risk. If I’d waited for another day, the snow would have melted, and who knows when another chance would come? When will we next get snow?

Chances to do new things will come your way. Follow your instinct. If it feels right, do it! New course? Learn to dance? Learn to ski? Why not!

I realise that having a Positive Spin is not practical all the time. But once you start to develop the habit, you’ll be surprised, as regular readers will know.

It’s like rolling a snowball. It grows… and grows…

… until it’s a way of life.

I’ve chosen to seize the day and upgrade this blog.

There’ll be a new look very soon! I could have waited until another day, but I decided the time was right. I’ll enjoy developing  and improving it for you, I’m certain of that.

Are you going to miss out on a magical, exciting experience?

Or are you going to say ‘Yes!’ and develop your Positive Spin?

What are you going to say ‘Yes’ to in 2011?

Do tell us. We all need some inspiration…

Header by cursedthing, post pic by theirhistory, on Flickr.



Filed under action, change, confidence, excuses,, fear, goals, happiness, hope, instincts, plans, positive, progress, success, timing

Looking For Something? New Direction! It’s Here!

Photo by Paolo Margari on Flickr


I lost my black velvet slippers. 

OK…they were old. 

Well past their ‘wear by’ date 

But they were comfortable and I wanted to find them. 

I turned the cottage upside down but no luck. They’d disappeared into thin air. I gave up and decided to buy some new ones. 

Weeks later I asked my OH to sort something on the computer for me. This involved crawling under my desk to fidddle with some wires. Right at the back where the spiders hide. 

‘Linda! You won’t believe what I’ve found!’ 

There they were –  right under my nose. I must have kicked them off under my desk and that’s where they’d been hiding.  

We’d been looking in the wrong place so we couldn’t have  found them… 


  • I need an idea to write about for you.

I start to search. I trawl my mind, consult books, go through my lists of ideas.  Zilch. A big fat nothing. 

Frustrated, I go downstairs to make a coffee and as I switch on the kettle… it comes to me. An idea. Being in my kitchen sparks off a thought. 

I’d been looking in the wrong place. The idea was right under my nose. 


  • I need a new writing project.

I go to the library, chat to writing friends, look in ‘Writing Magazine’, and then  this happens. 

I look out of my window… I live in what was a Victorian workhouse and  as I gaze into my tiny garden, I ‘see’ her.  An unmarried mother who lived here in the last century.  As I imagine our conversation I realise that here is my next project. Right under my nose. I will research the people who lived here and write an article about their lives. 

And that’s what I do. 


Are you … 

  • Looking for a new job?

Start right where you are. 

List your skills. Think of new ways to use them. 

What do people tell you you’re good at? What kind of job needs these skills ? 

The job you seek could be right under your nose. If you’re looking in the wrong place, you won’t find it.  


  • Looking for the solution to a problem?

Start where you are. 

Write it down. Now it won’t seem so bad. You’ve said it out loud. 

Now work out the one small step you can take today, towards solving this problem. 

Take that step. 

Now work out what the next small step might be… and so it gets solved. 

Not all at once. If it was that easy it wouldn’t be a problem. But if it matters to you, it matters. 

 The solution you seek could be right under your nose. If you’re looking in the wrong place, you won’t find it. 


  • Looking for a new direction?

New qualification? Want to volunteer? Want to find your ‘style’ in clothes or hair? 

Start right where you are. 

Look at what you have. 

What does your instinct tell you is right for you? 

What would you go for if you only had a month/6 months/year left? 

What have you always wanted to do but never got around to? 

 Trust me, I’m a Confidence coach! 

Whatever you’re searching for, start by looking ‘right under your nose’. 

Look carefully and you’ll be surprised what you’ll find. 


Looking for something?  

Where will you look? 


Header image courtesy of abbyreed on Flickr.

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Filed under action, change, Confidence Coaching, expectation, fear, goals, happiness, hope, instincts, plans, positive, progress, success, timing

Discover How Honesty Brings Confidence

Today I will help you to be honest about what you want to change/achieve.

 Last week I was afraid. Very afraid.

My female readers will understand when I tell you that I’d been for a routine mammogram.  And then I had to wait for the letter to tell me all was well. Except that it wasn’t. All well, that is.

I had to go back for more tests and x-rays. Which shouldn’t have been too much of a worry except that I have had breast cancer before and I didn’t exactly want to have it again.

In fact all WAS well. They just had to double check something.  Nothing at all to worry about.


It made me really think about all the things I would have done if it had been bad news, all the things I wouldn’t have put off, all the things on my ‘I’ll do it one day’ list…

When something like that happens it can be life changing. You realise what is and isn’t important, what you’ve been neglecting, who you should be seeing more of.



  • When you think about your life,  what’s missing?

Perhaps … you’ve always wanted to take a cookery class, do some voluntary work, be a prison visitor, learn to roller blade, go up in a hot-air balloon, travel by train to the North of Scotland, tell your mother-in-law what you really think of her…oooops! perhaps that might be a ‘step too far’…

Be honest…

Choose the ‘realistic, achievable with help and time on my side’ item on your list.


  • When you think about your life, what do you have too much/too little of?

Perhaps… you think your family expects too much of you and relies on you too much, your partner criticises you in public, it never seems to be ‘your turn.’

Be honest …

Choose the item at the top of your ‘I wish/if only’ list.


  • When you think about your relationships, what do you instinctively know is wrong?

Perhaps… you give in too much, you subdue your true feelings, you don’t comment on their drinking habits, the way they speak to you in front of the children, their critical remarks.

Be honest… 

Choose which aspect you’d deal with, if only you had the confidence

Forget about ‘shoulds’ and ‘oughts‘.

Just pause for a moment…

Imagine how much more confident you’ll feel once you begin to be honest with yourself…

And always remember…

Whatever matters to YOU, matters.


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You’ll Never Guess…

You can learn Confidence… from a BIRD!


Wow! They’re back – the House Martins!

Every year at about this time, I look out for the first House Martin and this morning there it was… preparing to build its nest.


I learn so much about Confidence by watching these birds.

I learn that…

  • it’s a  long journey.

To my amazement they fly all the way from Africa to spend the summer here.

Becoming confident is like that.

It’s not a walk in the park.

It takes courage.

And time.


They know their instinct will show them the path to fly.

It will lead them to where they need to be.

You path to Confidence is like that – your instinct will show you the path to take, if you trust it.


  • …I must believe.

They know the way.

They believe they will get here.

They will reach their goal – it’s achievable.

And so will you.


  • …I must persist.

I cannot begin to imagine embarking on such a long flight. But they set forth, in Confidence, because they know all will be well.

You must do the same.


The House Martins arrive, they build their nests and their fledglings will fly.

Wherever you are on your journey to Confidence, think about those House Martins –

  • prepare for a long journey
  • trust your instincts
  • believe you will succeed
  • persist, despite set- backs,

and like the House Martins, your fledgling Confidence will fly.

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Filed under Confidence Coaching, goals, instincts, persistence, progress, realistic, success